ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
