went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
everyone is single if you try hard enough
my sisters under your porch take her home
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
