office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Randomize
