I'm sorry my penis didn't work
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize