So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
she smelled like a LAN party
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Randomize
