lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize
