I'm laying in your front yard are you home
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
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