he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Naked Twister starts at high noon
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
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