i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
