i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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