its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
You work out of a Hotel?
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
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