In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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