Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
You need a sexual gate keeper
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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