fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
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