Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
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