girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
