Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Randomize
