your parents love me but you hate me
Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
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