**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Randomize
