FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
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