Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
