Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Randomize
