Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
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