Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
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