I want to make a zoo with you.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
Randomize
