Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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