Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
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Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize