no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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