Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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