he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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