Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
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