even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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