Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
