Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize