3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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