So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
