so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
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