I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I just saw a hot homeless man
You can't motorboat a personality
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize