i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
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I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
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Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
how does that bad decision feel?
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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