Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
