So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
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