he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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