I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
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