I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Randomize
