i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
