Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
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