Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
