I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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