It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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