Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
